Friday, July 16, 2010

Poop Happens


I've been having a rough time of it lately. Boyfriend is out of town, and I never sleep very well when he's not around.

The other night, I went to bed. Late, but not that late. It was somewhere around the neighborhood of midnight. I tossed and turned, tried sleeping in every position I could think of (literally-- horizontally across the bed, backwards with my feet near my pillow, you name it). Sleep just wasn't happening. Finally around 2 I decided to give up on sleeping and play some games on my phone to try and tire myself out. Half an hour later I finally fell asleep.

But not for long.

Groggily I opened my eyes in my dark bedroom. Something had awoken me. The smell. Oh. Dear. God. The foulest cat poo smell I had ever experienced. And that's saying something. "Great," I thought, assuming one of my fluffy-assed cats had gotten poopy butt again. For those of you non-cat parents who have heard that cats are self-cleaning, blah blah blah, you are blissfully misinformed! Fluffy cats often get poo stuck to their bottoms and must be cleaned up or they will drag ass all over your floor and leave skid marks everywhere. Awesome huh? Then I realized, to my horror, that Sienna, one of the furry stinkers, was sound asleep in the bed with me. And the smell was coming from her. 

I was picturing poo everywhere. The floor, the walls, all over our $1,000 mattress...you get the drift. So I scooped up Sleeping Beauty and took her into the bathroom for what I imagined would be yet another experience convincing me that cats are plenty of work and I do not want to ever have children. In the bathroom, Sienna yawned up at me. I held my breath and took a peek "under the hood".

Nothing. WTF? Where in the hell...? Sienna sniffed the air thoughtfully and then started grooming herself.

Turns out it was just one really disgusting litterbox visit that woke me up. Seriously gross. So guess who was stumbling around putting in a new glade plugin at 4:30 in the morning...?

I love my life.

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